Log in

No account? Create an account

Holy shit.

This happened.


And then this happened.


And...yeah...I'm going to finish this tomorrow.


I am STD-free. And I am also now on anti-depressants to quit smoking. Maybe they'll help me with the crazy also? Win.


Buck made me make this post. :P

I went to the shelter to look at some whippets they had available and the one I wanted had already been adopted. But I look over and I see this calm sweet Basenji mix just chillin' in the middle of 500 barking dogs. She reminds me of one of my childhood dogs, Amber.

So far, she is the best dog ever. She's been throwing up because of the anesthesia from getting fixed, but she's so fucking polite about it. She whined, puked, tried to hide it, then gave the most apologetic look and then went and laid down. Haha. It has stopped, though, thank god. I was starting to get worried.

She seems to have a good concept of potty training, too. Last night, she couldn't hold it and actually peed on her puppy pad! She also pooped right next to it and then also peed on the kitchen mat, but it probably looks like a puppy pad to her, and I don't like it anyway. I've taken her out several times and she usually goes when I tell her to, so YAY!

I can't wait til her stitches heal up and I can take her to a dog park or somewhere awesome!


Why yes, I do throw my clothes on the floor like a college freshman. :P Also, I had no downsized option for this picture. It's either this or a GIANT FUCKING PICTURE that will break your friends list.


This is her face whenever I try to leave the apartment. D: I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE, YOU GUYS! She cries! I needed to go to my work to drop something off and I could hear her from the parking lot as I was leaving. :( I went to starbucks first and came back and she had quit, so she doesn't do it the whole time, just at first. But still! My heart, it breaks.
Yesterday, he came in and kept asking to go home early. On buy one get one free day. When it didn't really happen, he started moping and angrily wiping the same spot on the counter instead of doing his damn job and breaking down the makeline equipment. Out of frustration I just told him to go home.

I got really nervous about how our work relationship was going to go, even though...we're supposed to still be friends?

Then today, he came and clocked in, then quietly shuffled over to me and shoved me over with his elbow. So, we're good. We played the entire shift.

At some point while he was cleaning, his butt crack was all hanging out, and I told him if I ever saw it again I would fill it with windex. Apparently, this means that "it's on". At least I have something to look forward to next weekend. :P

I'm done.

I'm not doing this whole dating or fucking thing ever again.

The last two times I hung out with William, I was made up, boobs up to my chin and feisty as all hell. No response. The first time it happened, I got up and left. He sent me texts as I was going home asking me why I left in such a hurry. I told him I felt rejected, and he apologized and said he just wasn't in the mood. We had a text fest, that ended with me asking if he wanted to get some coffee the next day before work to talk about things more and he said he'd love to.

The next day I texted him to meet up. I didn't get a response until two hours later when I was pulling up to the store. I went inside and asked Jose if I could come back in an hour because labor was really bad that week, and then headed off to William's apartment a few blocks away. I called him and said "Hey, are you ready?" "For what?" "For coffee." "Damn. I thought you meant like a few days from now." "No...yesterday I said tomorrow, which is today." "..." "Ok, fine, I'll just turn around and sit outside work 'til I can clock in." "Ok." WTF.

He showed up for work and I was pissed and tried to ignore him but he was so cocky and playful, and I couldn't help but giggle and smile and melt. We played the whole shift and made plans to hang out after I closed the store, which I did with amazing speed.

We went back to my place, and I showered and threw myself at him full throttle...to get no response. He wasn't...UP to it. After all that. I got nothing. Then he cried. He cried and apologized for being such a disappointment and said he was stressed and that's all he's ever done is disappoint people, that's why he can never go back home, la la la. I comforted him as he told me he was so afraid of ruining this relationship. I told him no way, you're so sweet and I'm sorry for being all shitty last night, la la la. We slept and I took him home Sunday before I went to work. While I was dropping him off, he told me that we have so much to talk about, hugged me, kissed me, we made plans for spring break the following week (this past week), excited that we could finally go on a real date, and off he went.

So he shows up to work later that day, and it's totally normal. I was outside cleaning the windows and he was taking a smoke break and we were bitching about how no one else does anything, and he received a phone call. He was excited to receive this phone call, and was talking to the person on the other line...not like he would talk to his roommates or a friend. I was thinking "Omg, now I'm being that crazy paranoid person."

So I call him that night, like a crazy paranoid person would, and I asked him if he want to have that talk. His response was, "Damn, I was talking about, you know, down the road." And as my heart flipped that we were on a road, I heard a girl's voice in the background. Surely it was just the tv or something, right!? We had a quick chat and got off the phone.

I didn't hear from him except to tell me he didn't want to hang out this and that night...until fucking Thursday when I texted him a picture of an art installation at Hermann Park from a newspaper. "Ooh, when can we go." We made plans to go Thursday night, and I asked if he wanted to spend the night and go to the Fine Arts Museum on Friday. We were set.

I picked him up after work and we went to my apartment. After I showered, I went in for a kiss and he did the side face thing where he kissed my cheek. I pointed it out and he shrugged. So we went off to the park and the whole time he had this..distance. We saw a piece of a play at Miller Outdoor Theater, and walked around the Japanese garden which was closed. Finally we headed off to the grocery store because I needed some cash and I wanted to make him dinner. Steak and potatoes. As I was picking out the steak, he drops this little bomb on me.

"You know the last couple of times, how things didn't..happen? Well, I want to be honest with you, I really tried, but I only think of you as a friend. A really awesome friend, but just a friend."

My response..."Dude, ok, I'm not having this conversation in the middle of the grocery store."

As pissed as I was to hear that...things were...not awkward after that, we actually started to have a really good time. We went back to the apartment and I cooked and we drank, and we watched Spirited Away...and then that's when disaster struck. He tickled me, he touched me, we play fought and every fucking touch felt like I was going to die right there. He started to put his arm around me at some point and stopped. He gave me a back rub. He slapped my ass. He had never been so physically playful and sweet before...and it killed me.

We woke up the next morning and went to the museum, and it was nice. Then I started driving him home. Disaster stuck again in the form of a tiny tear that wiggled it's way out from the corner of my eye. And then it's mom, cousins, and sister's friends all followed.

He asked if I was ok and I told him to shut up and look over that way because I totally wasn't crying. No, not me.

I got to his apartment and he said he was sorry and squeezed me tight and gave me little kisses. He told me I was awesome and that he had a great time.

I've been crying ever since. TO BE CONTINUED.


I'm happy. :)

Dating drives me fucking mad...

I've forgotten what to do with myself between the time that I send him a text message and he answers. I sit here looking at the phone like a dog must stare at the door when their humans leave for work.


Anyway, I have to open the store tomorrow...and then be there all fucking day...and then close the god damn place. 9:30am to 11:30pm...and that's if people aren't ordering til the last minute. If it rains tomorrow, I'm going to shit bricks. And then I might throw them at people.

Should be interesting.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

So, yesterday I got to hang out with my bff from when I was 15. He's married with a child now, and even though his wife was in a shit mood, she came out too and we all ended up having an awesome time.

While we were out, William texted me asking if I wanted to come over after he got off work. He ended up getting off at 10:30, and the entire time I was so antsy. I had to keep telling myself "Dude, you're out with people. You're having a good time. You can't just bail out over a guy. He's just a guy."

I ended up leaving at 1 (I told him this, I didn't just leave him waiting), and HAULED ASS the whole way there. I made what is usually a 20 minute drive in less than 15 minutes. My apologies to the Houston Police. You couldn't have stopped me.

Now, I'm going to be honest. The first couple of times we did it, were like "meh". The first was really awkward, but still fun. The second was...I guess he was out of it, but I was very not out of it, so it was unbalanced and made me feel self conscious. I was seriously questioning the entire thing after the second time.

Last night, however, was fucking amazing. And then he got over-excited and impaled me. I was on the bed in excruciating pain and could not fucking move. He felt so bad, and then he became so amazing. He started rubbing my tummy and did this thing where he pretended to be a doctor performing surgery to fix me. It sounds stupid because it is, but it was so fucking hilarious and adorable.

His prescription was a warm bath, and so I started to get up and he was like "NONONO, I'LL DO IT!" So, I'm laying there and I hear all this ruckus going on in the bathroom. When I heard the air-freshener is when I really started to lose it. He finally comes out and puts on "mood music", and I chuckle to myself as I walk to the bathroom.

You guys. I had a bubble bath with candles lit everywhere. My heart fucking melted. And that is when I realized that the pain I felt was really horrible gas and I had to find a way to let it out without him hearing. It was a bitch, and I did my best. I won't get into how, but it's really hard to let out a controlled fart while you're laughing at the wonderful fool in the next room who's belting out "Don't Stop Believing".

My methods worked so I dried off and laid back on the bed only to be greeted with more rubs and cuddles. He really earned what he got after that. Apparently, I was so awesome he uttered the words "I love you". I won't read too much into that, it was probably just a lack of blood flow to his brain.

I can't think of a clever title.

Yesterday, it was raining so hard and it was so busy when I got there, I didn't even fake looking up William's number in the computer to call him in. I called him straight from the makeline on my cellphone, and didn't even give a shit. It's a good thing my boss, Jose, didn't give a shit either, but now he makes fun of me and has been calling William my boyfriend. :|

Anyway, now that Jose knew we had some sort of relationship outside of work, I stopped being cold towards him when he came in, and was more playful (not overly so, just like I would be with everyone else), and in turn, he wasn't grumpy at all. He even laughed when I pointed out he was using too much cheese. WE NOW HAVE AN INSIDE JOKE!

William was in such a good mood, that since it was supposed to be busy today, Jose asked him to come in and help me open. This needs a bit of back story, maybe. You see, before I came along, William was..I wouldn't say not liked (but yeah), but he was so closed up that no one really knew him. So, for Jose to toss some hours at him like that, was pretty cool. He might have just done it for me, though. Still awesome, in my mind.

So, today. Today turned out not to be busy...but guess who dropped by!? Batman. FUCKING BATMAN. Also, Andy, thank god. After Andy showed up, the food truck rolled up and blocked him in so he was stuck at my store for several hours.

Since it was dead, me and Andy mostly just stood outside smoking and just talking. I told him about Batman (right before he showed up), and we laughed about it. Then, he told me he knew who I was dating. See, right after William gave me the note, I called Andy to ask what would happen if I dated someone at the store, and he said it's not a good idea, and so I said I wouldn't. So I asked him who he thought it was. His first thought: "Well, it can't be William, because he's a tool."

His second thought: "It's Cameron. I fucking know it's Cameron." You guys, Cameron looks and acts very similar to my cousin, Jarrett. So much so, that after he said that we had an entire conversation about it..and then I told him he was wrong. Andy decided that as long as it was Cameron, he wouldn't care, because Cameron is the shit (which he is). But I eventually told him the entire story and he cracked up. I told him there's nothing to worry about, we're just friends and getting to know each other (which isn't a lie, I've decided to stop sleeping with him).

So, Batman fixed our sink and then hung around FOREVER and kept asking me what I wanted for lunch and to come eat with him. I kept telling him I was busy, and I had things to do. I texted Andy while they were sitting in the office talking and told him to casually mention to Batman that I had a boyfriend...and to just say it was William because I had him in on it (which I did).

A minute later I hear, "WHAT!?" and I couldn't help but giggle. However, that information didn't make his ass leave, and William DID NOT HELP AT ALL. He thought it was the most hilarious thing he'd ever seen. He kept making references to Robin, and asking if our store was his batcave, and I kept shushing him because I was afraid it would make Batman angry.

So Andy leaves and Batman is *still* fucking there, not fixing anything, asking me to lunch and I continue to tell him I'm busy, I have this huge truck order to put away. At one point he just gets pissed off and goes "WELL, YOU'VE GOT THIS GUY OVER HERE JUST FOLDING BOXES, WHY DON'T YOU MAKE HIM DO IT!?" So I'm like "He's folding boxes because we fucking need boxes, I'm putting the truck away because I need to put the truck away. I'm at work. I'm. Busy."

His response? "Excuses." Yeah, well no shit, Sherlock. I texted Andy and told him to tell Batman to go fix something at another store, and he STILL stuck around for another 15-20 minutes before leaving. AND he asked me what time I get off. Ugh. It was at this point that William actually asked me if I was scared. I wasn't. I can take Batman if I need to. I don't think I will, but I can. But now that I'm writing about it, and reading it back to myself...a grown-ass man who thinks he's Batman is obsessed with me, and knows where I work, and doesn't know how to take no for an answer.



Not at me, though. Which is good..but...CHEESE!? REALLY!?